the adventures of pamalicious

I wanted to repost this because it includes the story of the Machete - it’s been awhile, so it might be a fresh read to some folks - enjoy!

Growing up with militant parents was quite interesting to say the least. Before joining the ‘nation’ my mom was a afro pick, fist up, huge afro card carrying Black Panther, Dad was a….hustler, lol Joining forces they became radical militant muslims and thus I grew up in a household that was all about the revolution. At any point and time my home was full of muslims and other outside the mainstream individuals and while the smooth sounds of miles davis filled the air, they ate smoked and drank coffee and talked about the state of the world till the wee hours of the morning.

Apparently the 70’s were just as turbulant as the 60’s and folks were fed up. We were living in Atlanta off of Cacase Rd. and though from a child’s eye, I didn’t see anything wrong - apparently there was. I don’t remember the exact conversation but I do remember I was around 7 1/2 or 8 at the time. My mom told me that my dad had decided that it was time for us to leave America and just go somewhere else to live. She wasn’t coming right away, but she would join us. We were selling everything we owned and just up and leaving..the comforts of home. I guess my Dad spun a globe or something, a la Coming to America, because our destination…..Central America! Even at that young age, I was like cool we getting on a plane go on down there, we got some kinda nice house and that’s just where we gonna live…….

WRONG! My Dad showed up bright and early one morning in This ———> and yes my friends, we set off DRIVING TO CENTRAL AMERICA! Since moms didn’t come, my step mom came and so in our van was 4 kids and two parents. The youngest being my sister was who was a lap baby. There were two other families coming with us so the caravan started out across the country towards our final destination, which I discovered was…Panama.

Here’s a map showing how far we traveled into central america. Now look to the upper right and add on all the states in between Georgia and California, cause we drove those too!

Alot of my memories are fuzzy about the actual trip and of course kid time is way different than adult time but let me tell you I know what the Middle Passage damn felt like! You talking bout a rough road to paradise, lol lol

Lawd have mercy! I had to really concentrate to bring up the memories surrounding this trip and here is what I remember in no particular order:

• There came a time in this trip where we basically ran out of money. We had been traveling what seemed like forever. All our supplies were just gone! We ended up living and eating in the VW. Our menu consisted of navy beans and stewed tomatoes cooked on the side of the road in a pot over open fire. It took me until I was damn near 35 before I would eat a stewed tomato again.
• Once we crossed the border, we all caught a couple of bugs and spent alot of time throwing up, my step mom stayed sick.
• While in Mexico, we went to this really cool amusement park and I saw a child drown under the boats.
• In some small city in Mexico, we went to this market to try to barter for some supplies. I went hysterical when I saw snakes hanging to be eaten as food.
• The entire country was in a state of revolution itself and we saw many after scenes of fights etc. There were always militia everywhere and we were warned as American’s to be careful.
• Joyous times running around in just our underwear with native peoples in small jungle communities during our trip. Eating mangos straight out of trees, playing in the ocean and just carefree.
• We had been without milk for like a month, we came upon this cafe and they said they had…CORNFLAKES. We were beside ourselves. Everyone ordered a bowl and they bought out this nice big decanters of milks. Poured the milk, dug in and threw up - it was HOT GOATS MILK! I was so tramuatized, I remember crying for like three hours until I was hiccuping.
• Days without water and only Coke to drink.
• I had this huge 20×22 size picture of my mom and spent alot of time looking at that picture and crying, we hadn’t seen her in months - until one day it was taken from me, because I was too through with living in tents etc. because we couldn’t afford hotels.
• I can piss just about anywhere and standing up like a man, sometimes it be’s that way.
• While driving through Nigurarga, we were stopped and all the women and children were kidnapped. I remember being blind folded and made to lay face down on the ground. I remember feeling the cool metal of the machete on my neck. My Daddy organized our safe return - he bought us back for two cases of coke and a case of..snickers and all the money all families had.
• Staying in five story hotels that had only one bathroom for the entire hotel! Six or Seven of us would crowd in at the same time.
• Washing our clothes on rocks in rivers. Going without underwear for days.
• I was up standing in the middle when we finally got to Panama. Just me and my daddy. The very first thing I saw was the JC Penneys and I exclaimed “Daddy they black like us - this just like America” LOL LOL LOL
• Everyday during siesta time, everything shut down. The TV went off, stores closed and we all took a nap.
• We were home schooled the entire trip and the entire time. Once in Panama we used to have school on the roof of the apt. building where we lived.
• In this apartment building, we had a dumb waiter that went from the top floor (floor six or so) to the bottom. We rode on that thing daily.

In my calculation it took us three months to get there. We arrived broke, hungry and ass out. At some point my mom (who was not even playing with the I am living off the land bs) secured her a managerial job at the Hilton, found an apt for us and was coming in less than a month. Within that month - we got so ass out that my Dad reconsidered the benefits of living in America and wanted to come back home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So after all of that: 3 months to get there, 3 months living there - my mom (who by then had sold everything we owned) took the money and we flew home. We had to start completely over as if we never existed, furniture, clothes, living quarters everything. I don’t think we talked to my dad for like a month when we got back, lol lol lol We reenrolled in school (we wern’t kept back) and life goes on.

Postscript: The other two families that went with us stayed. About 15 years ago - some of the kids came back to visit and they could only speak spanish, lol They bought land built homes and the ‘tribe’ swelled to a whole lotta people since ain’t really nothing to do and they didn’t have electricity so when the lights went out - ummm they got to mating, lol lol They are still there today and the only way I’m going to Mexico is via VACATION!