the adventures of pamalicious

Ahhh, I remember sitting and watching this with my family. Funny stuff I tell yah. You know sometimes I think about my mom’s so called hey day and how much she has impacted the community whether the community wants to admit and give her her props or not. There are alot of things that we take for granted that ultimately my mom had a hand in. All those wonderful books you have an opportunity to read written for black by blacks - she was the pioneer in getting our authors the recognition that they deserved and needed. When she came out with her book - she made the promise that she would only sell to Black Book Stores and distributors to this day that’s what she has done. The black book store exploded soley on the sale of her books and some would not exist today if they had not of had the push her book gave.  We flocked to them and along the way we discovered other black writers, we started to write and feel our work could be mainstream and today you have what we have.

Alot of people don’t know that she performed a Prince like move and wrote, published, printed and publicized all of her own work. She owns the plate to her books and was one of the if not the first black authors to make $.80 on the dollar instead of the other way around, as you would get if you gave it to one of the big publishers.

Those old enough to remember or have parents who do, remember that she was everywhere and did the talk show circuit continuously. I was in alot of those audiences. Living in NY at the time - I worked up the street from Montel, Phil and Sally and could just go over and come in. I learned alot about the talkshow business and how it works.

My mom knew going into it that what she had to say was NOT going to be received well, but I don’t think any of us thought it would instigate the type of venom that it did. Even after she pulled the ‘famous quote’ and edited future editions and backed up off of that statement, like we do, we kept on discrediting her message - because we (1) didn’t like it and (2) it hit to close to home and (3) the messenger wasn’t wrapped in something we idolize…like the cross/cresent moon. In 2007, I am reflective sometimes as I read, hear, look at the condition of our couples and the dating atmosphere etc. etc. because if NONE of what she said held any water - why are we bascially swimming in our own juices? Why are our relationships in the condition that they are in? Why are there still sooooo many sisters talking the same rap they had almost 20 years ago (cause it’s been that long)? I also shake my head, because in my opinion I have seen PLENTY of broads that needed a swift kick in the ass, a roundhouse if you ask me so a smack in the mouth would have been lightweight. I read the book, I read all of her books. I was raised by the woman who wrote the book and I saw some of myself in the book. That which I didn’t see I shucked to the left, that which caused me discomfort - I ran from but as I matured, I have revisited it and tucked it into my pocket and ultimately it has helped me because now I’m in a marriage situation and I’m rolling along making sure my marriage stays viable and alot of that has to do with how I carry myself.

My mom was oh so popular. Now she’s not so much, but she’s revered and respected the world over. Her books are still used in colleges throughout the country as required reading , she still gets speaking engagements on the regular. As with alot of things that don’t reek of southern principles, she is much more well received in the Northern States. She is more a friend of men than of women.

The one thing that folks can never say about her, was that she put aside her principals and ’sold out’ and you know how black folks got issues with that. She has the letters where Barnes and Noble tried to buy the rights to her books, she turned them down. She has all the stories about telling Oprah no and others because she wouldn’t cater to their agendas. I tell her all the time she doesn’t play well with others, but she always shoots back - if you knew how they really played, you would be throwing sand yourself.

In between all of that, she’s done other things. Did you know she used to be Janet Jackson’s personal assistant? Yea all for 3-6 months during the control years. She had to let that go due to her inability to cow down to someone who was the same age as me. We got alot of cool stuff out of it though, memorbilia and even a phone call from Miss Jackson herself.

For a 5′2 inch woman who has been mocked, talked about, made fun of, disrespected, threatened with death, disqualified, and alot of more things - she’s kept her dignity and her civilization and for that she won’t ever be forgotten.

So yea, I’m damn proud of my Mother and her accomplishments and if you hear her on the radio with Al Sharpton, or marching in Philadelphia for the rights of black school children in those messed up schools or speaking and teaching young mothers about how to raise strong children - you can say Hey that’s Pam’s mom but whatever you do - give SHAHRAZAD ALI her her props and respect because she deserves it.